Monday, November 17, 2014

Andy Samberg, Kiss My Mezuzah!

During the Hebrew month of Cheshvan, or MarCheshvan, [Bitter Cheshvan] there are no Jewish holidays. Jvillage Network, therefore, will be printing articles relating to Jewish Arts.


Rachel Bloom is going to be funny, no matter what you think of her and her lewd, Jewy, borderline-offensive brand of comedy


By Batya Ungar-Sargonfor Tablet Magazine


In Rachel Bloom’s animated music video “Historically Accurate Disney Princess Song,“ the princess in question wanders through her medieval town in search of love. Everyone seems to have found their prince but her, she laments in song, passing “the blacksmith with his daughter-wife, 10 years old and pregnant with her brother-son” and “a statue of Christ adorned with thief’s hands.” The princess dances and sings her way into the forest, where she encounters her friends, the Jews.

“Hello, Jews!” she cries with delight, addressing a group of two-foot-tall rounded creatures with egg-heads, who don’t speak so much as chirp. One has a monocle in one eye and a diamond in his hand, while another has beady black eyes. A third wears glasses. They have big hook-noses and wear yarmulkes. “You know, I never did ask you: Why do you live in the forest?” the princess coos, in the tone every Disney princess takes with her little creaturely friends. The Jews answer her with their chirping. “Oh, I see,” she says, “to hide from people trying to kill you. Well, that’s very resourceful, my beaky little friends!” The princess drops gold coins on the floor as Cinderella dropped corn, and the Jews dutifully bend to nibble. “Tell me: Have you ever had a dream that wouldn’t come true?” she trills. “Oh, I see, your dream is that people won’t want to kill you. Well, that’s definitely a dream that won’t come true!” she says, as characters in armor start to shoot arrows at the Jews and chase them off screen. “Oh, goodbye, goodbye!” she calls. Then, scrunching up her little cartoon nose and slitting her eyes, she grunts: “Jews.”

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